Do you see that little girl looking out the window at the world? What is she thinking as she stares at the trees moving in the wind? Why is her eyes full of water? Is she okay or is she dying on the inside? From the outside shes looks to be about 8 or 9. But in truth she is a grown woman full of pain and anger. Shes looking out trying to figure out where things went so wrong in her life. How so many could claim to love her but continue to hurt her so. Was there something wrong with her? Absolutely not but that was a thought that haunted her all of the time. See we can look in at the life of others and think that life is great. But we really don’t know what is going on in the mind and heart of another. So we need to stop being so consumed with things that really shouldn’t matter and start opening our eyes to whats right in front of us. So many people are suffering from depression and thinking of taking their own lives. So when you see that fake smile on a persons face ask God to show the hurt hidden in their heart. What a difference you could make in the life of another if we could stop being so selfish with our time.
Yes, I understand that we all go through something but what I have learned is that when I’m going through there is another who is suffering worse than me. Everything that we endure in life is for the benefit of another. When will we stop being ashamed to tell our story raw and uncut? Granted there are some things that you may not want to share and I believe you should be guided on what to share. As for me I was purposed to share my story and not the story of another. A story that tried to break my very spirit but God would not allow my spirit to die! He has given me strength in my weakest moments. He has loved me when I couldn’t stomach loving myself. He has guided me when I lost direction. He has protected me when I placed myself in danger. See one thing we must understand that God is almighty but the choices that we make will have a negative or positive outcome. Then there will be things that happen to us that we have no control over those things you have to turn around in order to free someone else from the prison they live in. I have never claimed to know it all and there are things that I am still walking through but I do know that God didn’t spare my life for me to waste it feeling sorry for my suffering!! What will you do with your suffering?? Will you let it imprison you or will you set yourself free?
Have we as women become so desperate for companionship that we settle for being someone else dirty little secret?? Or are we okay with settling for someone who is abusive either verbally or physically…maybe both? So what is causing us to lower who we are just to have a man in our lives? Is it loneliness, low self-esteem or are we looking for a void to be filled? And when do we realize that we are worth so much more then this crap that we settle for. Is giving your body away worth losing your soul to an illusion of what you call a relationship? These are things that I was thinking about as I sit here looking out my window. When I think about where I was and where God has brought me to my heart aches for women. Will some of you ever see your true worth?
Let me start with the dirty little secret. Why would we want to settle for that? And do you even realize that this is what you are? Sometimes as women we are so blinded by what we think is love that we fail to realize that all we are is a secret. God wants you to be a great thing that a man finds. If a man is constantly choosing another woman over you then he doesn’t really want you. Now he wants everything you’re giving him. Which is all of you without any commitment. Does a man truly love you when you give all of you and you can’t even meet his family? The answer is no what you are is a secret and that is likely all you will ever be. Then tossed to the side like trash when he’s done. Ladies please wake up and evaluate the situation that you are in.
Now let’s venture into the world of abuse and why we stay. In physical abuse I know a lot of women stay out of fear. Fear that they may be killed if they try to leave or fear that they can’t make it on their own. Maybe the man is the bread winner and there are children involved. Leaving the abuser is very hard to do. Some people think it is such an easy thing to do but it’s not. So please stop judging these women until you have walked in their shoes. What I will say is this when you see the signs early on run and don’t look back. You can’t change him to be the man that you want him to be. Only he has the capability to change by his will to want to change. But you can change your circumstances by realizing that you are worth more than being down graded.
So the bottom line is when you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you see a woman who is worth more than rubies? The Bible said, “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10. God saw us as something valuable so why can’t see ourselves the same way? Maybe we need to try and see ourselves as God sees us then maybe we will have more respect for self. Learn to love you before you try to love another. When you can love self you find that your standards will begin to change. I will end with a suggestion which is study Proverbs 31.